My wife was listening to a morning talk show and a woman called in and said she is no longer attracted to her husband and sex with him is unappealing. They have two small children and she was seeking advice. The talk show hosts basically called her a bitch and she needs to suck it up and get over it. Further into the discussion they find out another man was giving her attention her husband wasn't and it really wasn't a case of her becoming un-attracted to her husband.

So my wife asks me what I would do if I woke up one day and found her unattractive and didn't want to be with her. I initially responded that I would probably grin and bare it. Then I gave it a bit more thought and this is what I came up with

For one thing, you just don't wake up one morning and find your spouse unappealing. I feel this would be a gradual thing and if you let it happen then shame on you. Secondly, the reasons you married your spouse are based on a few factors. Attractiveness is one part, as is personality and other traits. The reasons you fell in love with someone don't disappear. If my wife gained 200 pounds the reasons I married her don't get lost in the mounds of fat she gained. Granted 200 pounds is a lot of weight and probably not something easily over looked but my point is underneath all that is still the woman I married and if the extra weight is something I can't get passed then as a decent human being and her husband I should be able to discuss the issue with her and work through it.

Here is a more realistic example. We all age, nothing you can do will stop that process from happening. Women tend to be a bit more concerned with the effects of aging than men so my wife feels the older she gets the less attractive she is. Age 20 or 60 she is still the woman I fell in love with. She is still the woman I asked to marry me. No amount of wrinkles or the effects of gravity can change that. Hell, I'm getting older too and my body isn't what it was at 20.

The bottom line of what I am trying to say is if there is an issue with your better half and you find yourself thinking about ending it you need to check yourself. People are divorce happy these days and will end a relationship over the stupidest crap. If your spouse is doing something that makes you feel less attracted to them then you need to speak up or get over yourself. If you feel they are letting themselves go then say something, get them to realize it is affecting you. Unless your spouse murders your family and has sex with chickens while mowing the lawn then by all means file for a divorce.